An old-school hankering for a Stewart Sandwich for lunch

I was driving down the highway last week when I had an old-school hankering for a Stewart Sandwich for lunch.

Of course, I was 30 years too late. The convenience store heat-and-eat sandwiches of my youth are long gone.

Or so I thought.

Before Royal Farms and Corner Mart stores were a thing, one could always find a selection of Stewart Sandwiches at any Shore Stop store on the Eastern Shore of Virginia. They even sold them at Capeville Elementary School, which I attended.

There was even a funky little microwave in the convenience store. The Twin Chili Dog had a number on it, you punched the same number on the microwave to warm up your victuals.

If you spent all morning on a dusty tractor, there was no better lunch than a freshly microwaved Stewart Sandwich and a Mr. Pibb, usually consumed in a worn-out pickup while swatting greenhead flies.

But like car ashtrays and hand-crank windows, Stewart Sandwiches just disappeared one day, dang it.

If you’re a bottom-feeder eater like me, you know there are other grab-and-gobble selections available these days at the local gas-and-go. But they’re expensive.

Showing true journalistic initiative and investigative reporting experience, I did some online digging and found the world headquarters of Stewart Sandwiches in Perrysburg, Ohio, and called.

A real person answered the phone — not a machine! — and I was impressed all over again with Stewart Sandwiches.

A woman named Angel — I truly had no doubt that a manufacturer of fuel-stop food would be named “Angel” — gave me the story.

Once, those tasty little suckers were available in 48 states, she said.

But Royal Deli Foods and Stewart Sandwiches in Perrysburg is the only distributor and franchise left. Management just cut back and decided to go smaller.

“We are the last one,” she said.

Stewart Sandwiches only are available these days in northern Ohio and southern Michigan. That's a long way to drive for a microwave burger, especially during a pandemic.

But they’re still cheap. The suggested retail price of a Stewart Sandwich hamburger is just $1, according to its website.

“Well, I’m in Virginia, so there’s no way I can get a Torpedo or a Chuckwagon today, or even a Stewart Sandwiches franchise,” I said, or something to that effect.

“That you would have to talk to the owner about,” she said.

No need for that, I told her.

I’ll get some potted meat and crackers for lunch instead.

Years ago, that’s what I would eat when Shore Stop was out of Stewart Sandwiches.